Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Buckle up

Seems I've been apologizing a lot lately. I'm sorry.

I really do have a good excuse, though. You might remember my post back in October about several things happening at once. I'd gotten a revise/resubmit request from my all-time Dream Agency. The first agency I ever queried back in Sept 2009 when I was just starting Debut Novel.

(Yep, in 2009 I sent a million-page query letter re: an unfinished novel... and then when I didn't hear back a week later, I sent a follow-up email. I was clueless. And rejected.)

Back to the story: I got right on the R&R, polished it up, sent it through the critters, and had that MS back in DA's hands by Thanksgiving.

All through the holidays, I bit my nails and refreshed my inbox while JRM admonished me that no one's working through Christmas. Me: They might!

January 4, I heard back from DA saying she really liked the revision and would I send my synopsis for others in the office to review. I didn't think I could breathe when that happened.

Naturally, I fretted that my synopsis wasn't good enough, but I sent it on and waited.

And waited.

And in the meantime, a different agent contacted me about liking my MS and would I be interested in talking on the phone about revisions and possibly resubmitting? Me: Yes, yes, nice to meetcha New Agent, but you see, I've got Dream Agent on the line here.

New Agent: Give that person a nudge and see where you stand.

So I hesitantly sent an email nudge, and guess what? That person was an assistant who is now gone. In a puff of smoke, she got a job elsewhere--a great job for her--but she left me high and dry.

I dragged my feet back to my chair and sat. Then I went under the desk and cried. And then my little gmail sing-song went off. New Agent wanted to know if I still wanted to talk--?

Me: Oh, right. Right. What were you saying again?

We made a date. And literally the same day, things at home went Off-the-charts Crazy. I'm not kidding.

Some of you knew unexpected schenanigans were happening on hubs's work front. Well, that day it became imperative for me to bring home the bacon. And a lot of it. Fast.

Thankfully, I've got one of those hourly jobs that never ends. So I was able to plant my butt in my seat and work nonstop for the last days of the month clocking hours.

Last Monday I posted about going down to stare at the waves so I could calm down. When I first got there, repeating in my brain over and over was the sound of Dorothy's voice: "I'm frightened, Auntie Em. I'm frightened."

(I know. I'm a goober, right?)

Those words were very formal for the panic gripping my chest, but I don't know. My brain.

I left after an hour of watching those glassy waves rolling in, one after the other, never stopping for centuries, at peace. By then my only thought was, "Thank you."

We really are going to be fine. God's been setting up a safety net for us since September--and we weren't even looking! I've got work, we've got a cushion, and there's even a job waiting that we simply have to accept. It's a good one, too.

It's just been... an exciting seven days.

And what about that call? Well, unfairly, I know, I put a lot of pressure on it to bail us out. You know, the Hollywood ending where the big offer comes and the music swells and we all click our heels because There's No Place Like Home.

It didn't happen. New Agent and I basically just chatted about the changes she thought I should make, and it now stands as another R&R request. The ball's back in my court.

I need to get started on it, but right now I feel completely winded. Motivation has abandoned me. And I've got bacon to bring home.

But I appreciate all your hugs and well-wishes and prayers. And I'll get back on my feet. We've got a mountain to climb before June (a yellow-brick road to follow?), but I'm hoping once we get there, we'll find out it had to get worse before it could get better.

More soon~ <3

37 comments:

Summer Ross said...

LTM- my thoughts are with you. It sounds like things have been very busy. I hope you can at least sit back and relax for a few hours before things spiral again. Best of luck with your revisions. Sending you fairy dust to help :) *****

Ellie said...

Oh, I want to give you a big supportive hug. Aggh. Like Summer says, make sure you take some time out. You deserve it!

200 Followers Q & A Competition

KarenG said...

Such ups and downs, what a rush and do you have a headache yet? I love the ups, hate the downs and worst of all is the waiting. What a story, goodness, and so you are back where you started at a revise and resubmit. But the good part is that your ms. will be all the better for it, and ready for either this agent or another or something else.

Angie said...

*hugs*, Leigh. I'm sure you'll make it through all right. Good luck!

DL Hammons said...

WOW. What a whirlwind of activities...and emotions! I'm glad your keeping things together...and in perspective. Here...take some of my positive thoughts for today. :)

Old Kitty said...

Oh LTM!!!! I'm really excited for you with these near agents- you will so get one, so, so, so close and nearly there - but also sad about your hubby and the need for you to increase your bacon bringing!!! Oh dear!! What a whirlwind of things happening!!!! Hang on in there LTM!! I hope things settle down. Good luck and big big hugs!!! Take care
x

Jessica Bell said...

Oh man, what a rollercoaster! :o( I'm flipping angry at that assistant. She didn't flippin contact you to say where she was going??? That's just, really, unfair. I'm sorry, honey. I really am. You know I'm here if you need anything. ((hugs)) XOXO

gideon 86 said...

Breathe, Leigh,

Life is full of ups and downs. You have all of us to vent whenever you need to and remember there's always a bear hug from me waiting for you if things get too crazy!

Michael

LTM said...

((hugs)) Thanks, guys~
I emailed most, but @Summer--Thanks so much for the pixie dust! It helps me fly~ ;p
As I'm sure you expect, the wheels are already turning, whether I can stop and follow up on them or not. I am hastily scribbling notes, and I'm doing my best to make the rounds~
Thank you! :o) <3

walk2write said...

I don't want to add to your to-visit list. Just wanted to stop by and say hi. We're almost neighbors! I do understand that urge to watch the waves. Good luck with the progress of your novel.

Carolyn Abiad said...

:( Sigh. I know it's hard but your writing is so touching and I know someone at that DA will wake up and recognize it! And the rest will work out eventually too. In the meantime, we're all here for you. XOXO, <3s, ((hugs)) and all that kind of stuff!

Susan Kaye Quinn said...

Oh, LT, such a roller coaster! And when the wind is gone, you sometimes have to take a break. I'm glad you've got what you need for the moment, and the future will bring what you want, if you keep at it. Having a couple agents interested in you is no small shakes, sweetie! Keep remembering that...

Scarlett said...

Oh, dear friend, I am so sorry the world seems to have dropped a turd in your punch bowl! Times are hard for so many now, but I know you LOVE to write and maybe you can turn that R&R into an outlet. After all, I know you enjoying writing and I am ALWAYS looking forward to YOUR "get-to-know" articles! My grandmother always would tell me, "This too shall pass", and you know?, she was right. And hey, most successful authors were rejected numerous times. It is fuel to the fire! (I may need you to remind me of that one day!)

Lydia K said...

All I can say is that if you're getting R & R phone calls from agents, you're going to get an agent! Maybe not today, but someday, you definitely will!

Colene Murphy said...

I agree with Lydia, you will definitely make it! You have had so many nibbles, that must be one juicy fish you have there!! I hope everything evens out on the bacon makin' route SOON! It WILL work out and you are going to be just fine, but I hope it hurries up! You are missed and you have tweeks to make! Feel blessed, gal. Things might not be working out like you hoped but things are working out for the best for sure.

aspiring_x said...

oooh! you are getting close!!!

hang in there with the bacon stuff!

praying for you!

LTM said...

ergh--(((big hugs))) you guys are so great. Thank you all for the encouraging words and kind thoughts and prayers. It means so much. Things are WILD! I've emailed most of you~

@Scarlett--I'm so sorry *you* guys have been sick! Ugh!!! But you made me snort w/your comment, and a big hug to you for being so sweet. And you're absolutely right. And "this too shall pass"~ xoxo :o) <3

Tracy said...

Awww, Sometimes words just seem so inadequate. I am sorry things are rough right now but when God closes a door, He opens a window. Hang in there and deep breath, another and yet another...
hugs...

Shannon said...

It's all about celebrating the small victories, isn't it?

But for you - I see big ones. Job. Talking to agents. No more stress and woe.

Quoting Howard Jones:
Things can only get better

Rayna M. Iyer said...

Life has been hectic crazy for me the last month, so only just got here.
Keeping my fingers and toes crossed for you. Like my son would put it, hard work always pays off specially when combined with talent.

Tracy said...

Isn't it strange how there can be periods of stasis where you feel like NOTHING is happening in any realm of your life. Then BOOM! Everything begins changing all at once.

I can't speak on the other stuff going on your plate, but when it comes to the MS. I'd take a good deal of comfort in the fact that you've got agents taking the time to ask for revisions. If they weren't highly intrigued, they would have hit the R button. Hopefully that will help keep your chin up through the stressful times.

And I'm sorry, but there's no need to apologize ;)

LTM said...

@Rayna--your little boys have much wisdom. ((squeeze)) them! :D xoxo

@Tracy--YES! omg--it's been like that here since Oct, and I'm ready for things to settle down! Thanks, girl. I wish all I had to think about was the R&R. As it is... bluh. :p xoxo Thank you!

Laura Pauling said...

It might be a little discouraging but having an RnR is a great place to be too. And it sounds like God is providing!

Clarissa Draper said...

First of all, I'm so happy that you found an agent so willing to look at your manuscript. Second, I really hope your way clears soon. R&R is so important.

Matthew Rush said...

I'm sorry about the DA situation falling through, I had no idea, but it does sound like you've got other options waiting in the wings, which is great.

I totally understand about having to take care of the day to day first. It's not an option.

Hart Johnson said...

I'm sending hugs... I have known most of this--it's very cool that you can bump up the job you've GOT... I know... a pain on the writing and you have to WORK IT but far better than having to FIND something... Hang in there... February is always a bust anyway... Big PAIN of a month, if you ask me... Let the book thoughts percolate and THEN get back to it...

Angela Felsted said...

Well, I'm sorry things didn't work out with the agent, but I'm so glad that you have a job. That's always a good thing.

LTM said...

@Laura--I know. I know. You're right. I think I was feeling a bit overwhelmed... and possibly still am. But what you're saying is true. Thanks so much~ :o) <3

DEZMOND said...

you do know you will always be fine, Leigh, no matter what happens, rains or shines :)

Jennie Bailey said...

Oh the views you're going to have from that mountain, sister! All that climbing - you'll be looking down behind you afterward saying 'that wasn't as bad as it looked'. I hate the panic. That chest gripping, no fun panic. And I'm sorry about DA. One door closes, another opens with NA. Though the whole door didn't really shut at DA. More like the screen door. Someone may open it again. Or you may find the door to NA leads to a much better, brighter room! Continuing to think good thoughts for you!!

Abby Minard said...

I found your blog from Lisa Galek's. Hugs to you! Sounds like you've been through a lot lately! I hope you can get on with that agent! Who knows, she may just be your dream agent without you even knowing!

Morgan said...

I hope your situation improves. It sounds like it already may be! Stay strong. And even with everything going on, don't lose sight of that revision request. You never know what might happen!

LTM said...

@Morgan--it's true, and now my challenge is finding time to get it done! I will~ :o) <3

Katie Mills said...

awe man, it sucks when life goes nuts like that. I'm so glad to hear things have settled down and I'm sorry 'the call' wasn't what you'd hoped. Motivation will come eventually! Keep yer chin up sistah!

Marie Rearden said...

You're hearing back, though. That's phenomenal! Life's crazy, but you seem to be a very positive person.

Just found your blog, and I'm sticking around. :)

Marie, http://marierearden.blogspot.com

Vicki Rocho said...

I love the part about God setting up a safety net...funny how those things happen when we're not paying attention.

Sucks that you were left high and dry by the first agent, but how amazing that you've got another one on the line! You are sooo close!

Lisa said...

This is awesome! I think it's great that she wanted to speak with you about it! Good luck on the revising and resubmitting - I have a good feeling about this!